Escape to Gretna: Luxury Courtyard Hotel in New Orleans Westbank
Escape to Gretna: Luxury Courtyard Hotel - A Review Filled with Soul (and Maybe Some Slightly Stinky Feet)
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into the world of Escape to Gretna: Luxury Courtyard Hotel in the New Orleans Westbank. This isn't your average, sterile hotel review. We're talking messy, honest, and with a healthy dose of "did I leave my socks in the car?" type of charm. You've been warned.
First Impressions & That Damn Elevator:
From the moment I pulled up, the courtyard beckons. Seriously, that courtyard is the star of the show. Lush greenery, inviting walkways… it's like a hidden oasis. However, I’m a bit gimpy, a bit "old knees" if you will – so Accessibility is huge. While the hotel says it's accessible, the elevator situation… well, let's just say it's not quite humming along perfectly. Getting to my room on the high floor felt a little like a dramatic climb, and I really did wish, in my heart's heart, that it was a little more reliable. But hey, the front desk staff, bless their hearts, we're super helpful and always smiled.
Room Rave (and a Tiny Complaint About the Slippers):
Okay, the rooms? Spot on. Seriously, the Air Conditioning blasted a beautiful Arctic breeze into my sweaty New Orleans-bound body, and I practically lived in the Bathrobes. Bonus points for the extra long bed, which is a must for us tall folk and the Blackout Curtains, perfect for battling the jetlag demons and those pesky Louisiana sunrises. The Internet access – wireless was flawless, thankfully, and I loved the Laptop workspace – ideal for doing… well, some very important online shopping, I swear. The Complimentary tea was a nice touch, almost as good as the Free bottled water, since hydration is the name of the game in the south.
But the slippers, oh the slippers. Don’t expect top-of-the-line luxury slippers, okay? Think "hotel-provided-slippers." They got stained, they got a little… stinky… But the private bathroom? Immaculate. The separate shower/bathtub? Glorious. And the Hair dryer? Absolutely saved me from a disastrous hair day.
Dining & Drinking - Where Things Got Interesting (Mostly):
Let’s talk food, because, come on, we're in Louisiana! The hotel boasts a variety of options. The Breakfast [buffet]? A mixed bag, honestly. The Western breakfast felt a little…meh… but the Asian breakfast, if you're open to it? Unexpectedly brilliant. The Coffee/tea in restaurant was decent, but sometimes I just want a decent cup of coffee, you know? And the Coffee shop was a welcome retreat, with some excellent cafe and pastry treats.
There's a Bar, of course, with a Poolside bar which looked pretty inviting, but I'm not a huge drinker. It’s there, though, and happy hour felt lively. Now, I didn't experience everything, but it felt like a great place to socialize. The Restaurants offer a range of cuisines, including International cuisine in restaurant. I can't vouch for specific dishes (remember, this is a messy review!), but the atmosphere was always pleasant, and the service was attentive. They also have a Schnack bar where you could get a lot of snacks.
Things to Do & Ways to Relax – My Spa-tacular Story:
Okay, so this is where things get personal. You know I was all about the Spa. I went balls-to-the-wall with the spa experience, starting with a Body wrap. I won't bore you with the details, but let me just say, I emerged feeling like a new person. Seriously. The Spa itself is gorgeous. The Sauna was the perfect level of hot, and the Steamroom melted away all my anxieties. Then there was the Massage. Oh, the massage. I almost fell asleep. It was… incredible. The masseuse was amazing and really listened to my tense muscles.
They've got a Fitness center too, but I spent more time relaxing in the Swimming pool – which is beautiful, by the way. The water had a great temperature and I found it easy to just drift for a bit, letting the sun kiss my face.
Cleanliness & Safety – Feeling Safe Isn't Sexy, but It's Important:
The hotel feels very safe, and that’s a huge plus. They’ve got a lot of Safety/security feature, like CCTV in common areas, and a Front desk [24-hour]. I felt so safe. The whole time. The Anti-viral cleaning products made me feel a bit better about the state of the world, and the Rooms sanitized between stays is definitely a plus.
Conveniences & Services – The Little Things Matter:
They offer a lot of stuff, which is nice. Things like Daily housekeeping, Concierge, Laundry service, and a Gift/souvenir shop. There's a Convenience store too, which came in handy for late-night snack runs. Cash withdrawal is available, which is always helpful.
For the Kids – Yeah, They Got It Covered:
Look, I didn't bring any kids. But the Family/child friendly vibe is strong. They've got Babysitting service and Kids facilities, so if you're traveling with your little ones, you're set.
Getting Around – Navigating New Orleans:
This is where things got tricky again. I had to rely to a lot on a Taxi service. The Car park [free of charge] is awesome (and you can find Car park [on-site] as well), and I got around with Airport transfer.
The Bottom Line (and a Tiny Confession):
Escape to Gretna is a solid choice. There are some minor hiccups (that elevator!), but overall, it’s a lovely hotel with a beautiful courtyard and a seriously good spa. I loved it and am already looking forward to my return!
My Official Hotel Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars.
NOW, THAT OFFER! (Because Why Not?)
Tired of the Ordinary? Escape to Gretna & Rediscover Your Zen!
Are you craving a getaway that blends luxury, relaxation, and a touch of Southern charm? Then look no further than Escape to Gretna: Luxury Courtyard Hotel!
Here's what we offer:
- Unwind in Stunning Rooms: Sink into plush beds, enjoy blackout curtains, and soak in the beauty of our meticulously designed rooms.
- Pamper Yourself in Our Spa: Experience pure bliss with our body wraps, massages, sauna, and steam room. Leave feeling refreshed, rejuvenated, and ready to take on the world!
- Savor Delicious Cuisine: From Asian-inspired breakfast to international flavors, our restaurants offer something for every palate. Sip cocktails at our poolside bar and create memorable dining experiences.
- Explore New Orleans Westbank: Discover the hidden treasures of the area, or easily access the vibrant heart of New Orleans.
- Unbeatable Convenience: Enjoy free Wi-Fi, complimentary tea, and all the amenities you need for a comfortable stay.
Book Your Gretna Getaway Today and Unlock a World of Relaxation!
Special Offer:
- Book your stay this month and receive a complimentary bottle of wine upon arrival!
- Enjoy 15% off all spa treatments when you book a room.
Don't wait! Escape to Gretna and experience a truly unforgettable getaway. Click here to book now!
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Luxury Escapes Await: Uncover Hotel Mision Leon's Hidden Gems!
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because this ain't your grandma's itinerary. This is my trip – a whirlwind of potential triumph and inevitable chaos through the swampy, soulful streets of New Orleans, commencing from the surprisingly not-terrible Courtyard New Orleans Westbank/Gretna. Let's see if I survive this… intact. (Spoiler: I probably won't.)
Day 1: Arrival, Anxiety, and Amazing Gumbo
- 1:00 PM: Touchdown, New Orleans. (Insert triumphant music here… except I'm too stressed to find it. The flight was delayed, of course. Of course. My luggage? Probably in Alaska. This is starting out great.)
- Rambling thought: Why is it always the luggage? It's like it has a vendetta against me personally. Anyway, gotta grab an Uber to the hotel. Praying for a driver who doesn't try to sell me timeshares.
- 2:00 PM: Check-in at the Courtyard. It looks… fine. The check-in lady, bless her heart, seemed a little lost in space. Gave me a room overlooking… I think it might be a highway. Delightful.
- Quirky observation: Is it just me, or do hotel rooms always smell vaguely of sadness and industrial cleaning products? Still, at least it's a bed. And I'm going to need it. My nerves are fried.
- 3:00 PM: Unpack (or what passes for unpacking when you're convinced your suitcase is currently vacationing in the Yukon). Decide to just chuck everything on a chair and pretend I have my life together. Fail spectacularly.
- 4:00 PM: Gumbo Quest! A local, according to Yelp, is the legendary "Mother's Restaurant". I need that. NEED. IT.
- Emotional reaction: The hope of gumbo is the only thing keeping me from curling up in a ball and weeping. This trip better deliver on the food front, or so help me…
- 5:00 PM: Uber to Mother's. The driver, thank God, wasn't trying to sell me anything. Just talked about his grandkids and the Saints. Started to actually feel a little… human.
- 6:00 PM: Mother's. The line… dear God, the line. I'm already regretting everything, but the smell. Oh, the smell. Pork debris and ham, and… hope.
- Anecdote: So, I finally got to the front. The cashier, a woman with a smile so warm it could melt glaciers, asked me what I wanted. I stammered. I froze. I pointed at the gumbo. "The gumbo," I squeaked. "Get the Ferdi Special," she said, "You won't regret it." She was right. I could have cried. Or eaten another bowl. Possibly both.
- 8:00 PM: Stagger back to the hotel, gumbo-drunk and slightly less terrified. The highway view is still depressing, but the memory of that gumbo… chef's kiss.
Day 2: French Quarter Frenzy and a Slight Hangover
- 9:00 AM: Wake up. My head hurts. Pretty sure it's not the gumbo. Probably the two hurricanes the night before. (Who am I kidding? Definitely the hurricanes.)
- Imperfection: Okay, so I may have gotten a little carried away with the cocktails last night. And I might have accidentally joined a second line parade. And I, possibly… maybe… got a tattoo. Details are hazy. Praying it's something I won't regret in the harsh light of morning.
- 10:00 AM: Coffee. Desperately needed coffee. And maybe a prayer to the hangover gods.
- 11:00 AM: Uber to the French Quarter. Avoid eye contact with the tourists. Try not to get run over by a streetcar.
- On-the-spot Reaction: The French Quarter is… a lot. The chaos is electrifying, overwhelming, and somehow, utterly charming. I'm already overwhelmed, but I'm loving it too.
- 12:00 PM: Walk around. Take photos. Get lost. (Mission accomplished.)
- 1:00 PM: Beignets & Coffee at Cafe Du Monde. The line again. The sugary smell from the beignets is divine.
- Quirky Observation: The beignets are basically giant, fried pillows of happiness. And powdered sugar is my new religion.
- 3:00 PM: Browse the shops. Buy a voodoo doll (just in case). Stumble into a jazz club.
- 4:00 PM: Jazz. Listen. Lose track of time. Feel my soul reconnect with something. This is why I came here. Feel alive again.
- 7:00 PM: Dinner at a place I found on a napkin. (Don't judge.) The food was good, and the experience was everything.
- 9:00 PM: Drag yourself back to the hotel. Decide to skip the bar this time. (Probably a wise choice, given the tattoo situation.)
Day 3: Swamp Tour, Sad Departure, and a Promise to Return (Eventually)
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast at the hotel. (It's fine. It's fuel.)
- 10:00 AM: Head out for a swamp tour. The bayou sounds intimidating, but I'm sure I can handle it.
- 11:00 AM: Swamp tour! See alligators. Get yelled at by a bird. (Apparently, I was standing too close to its nest. Whoops.)
- Anecdote: The tour guide, a grizzled Louisiana native, told us stories about the bayou. He told us his life, the stories of his family. He seemed like he was almost a part of the swamp.
- 1:00 PM: Lunch. (I think I ate a crawfish.)
- 2:00 PM: Last-minute souvenir shopping (because, of course, I hadn't done it before).
- 3:00 PM: Head to the airport, feeling a strange mix of exhaustion and sadness.
- Emotional Reaction: I feel like I'm leaving a piece of myself here. New Orleans has a way of doing that, of creeping under your skin and refusing to let go.
- 5:00 PM: Departure. Looking back at the city.
- Opinionated Language: New Orleans, I hate to leave you. Your people, your food, your music – it's all so wonderfully chaotic and full of life. I'll be back. I don't know when. But I'll be back.
- Wherever PM: Contemplate the meaning of life while waiting for my connection in Dulles. Probably buy a book. And definitely plan my return trip. This time, with better luggage. And maybe a slightly less questionable tattoo.
Final Thoughts:
This trip was messy, beautiful, and exactly what I needed. New Orleans, you magnificent, swampy, glorious mess. Until next time.
Uncover the Hidden Gem: Bannoi Himsuan Chiang Mai's Secret Paradise!
Escape to Gretna: You *Need* the Luxury Experience. Trust Me. (Mostly)
Okay, Gretna. Sounds… well, Gretna. Is this place *actually* nice? Like, legit?
Alright, let's be real. Gretna, on the Westbank... It's not the French Quarter, folks. You're not stumbling out of a jazz club at 3 AM. But "nice"? Yeah, ABSOLUTELY. It's genuinely refreshing. And trust me, after getting *lost* in the Quarter for a week, the peace and quiet were worth their weight in gold. This "Luxury Courtyard Hotel" thing? They're leaning into the 'luxury' part. Think crisp linens, seriously comfy beds (I actually *slept*!), and a courtyard that’s begging you to sip a daiquiri. (More on that later...) But sometimes, it feels like they're *trying* to be fancy… and failing just a tad bit. Like, the "art" in the lobby? I'm not sure if it's "haute" or "home-decor-on-a-budget-from-Target." However, the staff? *Fantastic.* They’re genuinely helpful, which counts for a lot!
What's this courtyard everyone's raving about? Worth the hype?
The courtyard. Oh, the courtyard. Look, I am a courtyard *convert*. It's the *soul* of the place. Big, lush with like, two fountains that *actually* fountain, tables, chairs, and these big umbrellas that provide shade. You can seriously do *nothing* and still feel like you’re winning at life. One morning, I just sat there, nursing a coffee, and watched a tiny, confused hummingbird bounce around. I swear, I felt more relaxed than I have in… well, since before this trip. The only "downside"? The occasional loud-ish conversation from the other guests. But hey, that's life. And they do have some weirdly adorable little lights strung up at night that give it a magical vibe. Definitely worth the hype. Go there. Sit. *Breathe.*
Food. Tell me about the food situation. Because that's important.
Alright, food. Okay, so. There's a restaurant attached, and I, unfortunately, had *mixed* feelings. One night, I ordered the shrimp etouffee. It was… fine. Edible. Not the most amazing thing I've ever eaten, but it filled a hole. The next morning however? The breakfast buffet? Absolute disaster! There were stale pastries and the scrambled eggs tasted like they came straight from the powdered stuff. The Saving Grace, however? The bar. The bar had a fantastic bartender named “Boudin” (or at least that's what he introduced himself as), and his daiquiris? *To die for.* I'm convinced the entire experience was worth it, just for those daiquiris and his delightful stories. Ask for a "Hurricane" – you won't regret it. (Just remember, pace yourself. My memory of Day 2 is… hazy.) But the local options? AMAZING! Ask the staff for some recommendations. Seriously, they know *everything* and will point you in the right direction for some delicious food.
Location, location, location! Is this even a good launching point for exploring New Orleans?
Okay so, here’s the deal. Gretna is on the Westbank, and that means you need to plan for driving. The hotel gives you easy access to the highway and the roads are relatively clear in the morning. Traffic to the French Quarter can be a beast, especially during rush hour. It’s not ideal if you're the type who wants to just wander out your door and be in the thick of things. But! The Westbank has its own charm. Gretna itself has a surprisingly cute little arts district. And, you're close enough to the city to zip over, hit all the tourist spots, and then *retreat* to your oasis of calm. Seriously, you can escape the crowds anytime you like. This is *huge* after battling the French quarter's hustle and bustle.
Anything to watch out for? Any *real* gripes?
Alright, time for the real dirt. Firstly, the Wi-Fi. Sometimes (and by sometimes, I mean frequently during the day), it was… well, challenging. I actually cursed it out loud once. And the walls? *Thin*. You can hear your neighbors if they are loud. (Thankfully, my neighbors were relatively quiet. Phew!). The parking situation is a little cramped, especially if you're driving a big car. The pool? Nice enough, but small. I can't deny the place being a little…corporate. A little… soulless in some respects. But, let's be honest, I'm pretty sure those are minor annoyances. Mostly. Overall? Honestly? Highly recommended. Just set your expectations accordingly.
Is it "Luxury" Luxury?
Okay, let's address the elephant in the room: "Luxury". It's the bait, right? And it's… a bit aspirational, shall we say. It's "Luxury" with some concessions. Think: High-quality, but not necessarily haute couture. The lobby is pretty, the courtyard is stunning, the rooms are tidy and comfortable but like... it’s not over-the-top, lavish luxury. It’s the kind of place that’s *trying* to be luxurious, but it won't break the bank. I'd say it's more like "Comfortable & Convenient, with a Courtyard that makes you feel like a rich person." The lack of true luxury is not a deal-breaker, it's just… *real*.
Should I book it? Give it to me straight!
Alright, bottom line. YES. Book it. Especially if you want a respite. It’s a good base camp for exploring New Orleans, and it's a haven of calm. Remember my daiquiri anecdote? Seriously, I need another one. Go for the ambiance. Go for the helpful staff, go for the daiquiris, and come back and write your own review! Just… don’t expect perfection, and you won’t be disappointed. And *please*, tell Boudin I said hello.
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